Well... it would be a lie if I told you that everything was fine inside my head and heart right now. The last few days I have been bombarded with ridiculous and irrational hypotheticals regarding labor and being a mom, and it has brought out so much fear in me. On the outside, I appear just fine... you might even think I'm looking forward to child birth. But on the inside, Satan is completely attacking me! This morning, I have spent a ton of time with the Lord... essentially, casting all of my cares on Him. I already feel a sense of His peace, just through the verses I read this morning. But I know how easily this fear can creep right back into me. I am simply praying that the Lord will calm my fears and allow these next few days to be relaxing and enjoyable.
I'm convinced that Harper likes her current home because I can still feel her up in my ribs. Thankfully my doctor and I discussed a possible induction date, just in case she really decides to stay put. It has really helped my mind knowing that she will definitely be here by the 12th. Honestly, I don't want to be induced, but since I'm not in charge... I need to get over it. So I am resting in the truth that the Lord knows what is best for both me and Harper, and He will allow it to happen in His timing. Until then, I will continue to do what I do best... sit (I know I should be walking, but it KILLS my back, so I'm just choosing to be lazy today!).
11 comments:
Girl, you just be as lazy as you want to be. You need it!!
Don't let Satan wear you down, God is all over you right now. Continue to cast your fears upon him. Once you get into that hospital you are going to be in great hands, and childbirth is an everyday event for them! I know with your first baby it seems as though you are the only one to be going through what you're going through. But truth be known, you're probably not going to surprise any doctors. You are going to do beautifully and I can't wait to see pictures of the sweet little thing soon!! So soon!!
P.S. I made a couple wording mistakes on my post the first time- that were WAY wrong, so I had to start over!! That's why it says I deleted my first comment!
Lauren,
I know that you and I have not actually met but I have heard so much about you from Lindsey...so I feel as if I know you.
I have been praying for you and I will continue to pray for you and sweet Harper. And I am praying that God will give you a PEACE unlike anything you have ever know.
Hopefully one day soon I will get to meet you and your family in person.
Dear Lord, I pray you know when it's best for Lauren and Harper...and that you remember I am out of town this weekend. Amen.
Lauren, Please know I am praying for you during this time! I can't imagine all the emotions you are going through--I love you!!
Lauren, you are going to do awesome! Before you know it you will holding that sweet baby girl and won't remember or care about anything you had to do to get her here.
poor thing. i'm hoping that it either goes smoothly until the 12th, or that she changes her mind and decides to come on!! I want to see that face!
Lauren... I read this stuck in traffic today and just wept for a good 5 minutes. I feel much more normal and it was so encouraging to read. I'm confident that you will do great and Harper is going to be precious. Remember that "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty"... And put those feet up. I'm preaching to the choir I know! Praying for you friend!
You are going to do amazing! I remember just fearing all the "unkowns," but a verse that stuck out to me the whole time was Colossians 1:17, "He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together." Praying for you! Can't wait to see pics of that little girl! And rest AS MUCH AS YOU CAN NOW!!!
I am praying!!! I know exactly...EVERY FEELING that you are having!!!! I hope Harper and our sweetie come on the same day, too! So fun! I am scared and a little uneasy about being induced. It seems like everyone is telling me not to do it. But, I have full faith in our doctor. He is an amazing Christain man and I do not think he would allow it to happen if it were that bad of a thing to do! So, I rest safely in the arms of the Lord! I have been praying Phil 4:6-7 for myself. I will be praying it over you too! And yes...I am up at 5:30 am and have been up since 4:00 am!
I can't believe it's been over 5 months since I had those same feelings. We are praying for you and Harper..God knows the exact time and surroundings you'll need around you before you get to kiss Harper's sweet face.
You will be an incredible mommy and Harper is one lucky girl!
Praying for a safe and easy delivery and a quick recovery. I will also pray that you don't let Satan get to you...of course he wants to ruion this precious time!
Love ya and can't wait to see pictures!
Sydney
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